i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
Randomize
