I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Randomize
