FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize