I'm lost and stupid without you.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
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