just tell him i said nine months
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize