Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
