I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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