i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize
