I wannas sexs uuuuu
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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