I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
