Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
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