i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
