Buhtt sex?
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
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