I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
