Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Randomize
