YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
from now on my penis is your penis
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
