Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Randomize