but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
