i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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