question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Randomize
