When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
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