Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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