he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
