i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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