in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
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