When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
