Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Randomize