i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize