my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
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