is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
So. Much. Porn.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
