yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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