So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
two words...techno handjob
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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