I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Randomize
