Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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