Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
