Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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