I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Randomize
