I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
You smell like stripper and shame
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
