i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Even my vagina gasped.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize