Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
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