Rock
Scissors
Fuck
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I would ride that face into the sunset
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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