Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
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