I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
