is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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