I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize