You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Randomize