honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
