I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
