awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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