he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Actions speak louder than pants.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Randomize
