remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
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